Who is your Warren Buffett?
Warren Buffett, billionaire investor and CEO of Berkshire Hathaway, recently turned 90. Former Microsoft CEO Bill Gates has been friends with Buffett for over thirty years and honored his buddy, a man who famously eats like a first-grader, by making him an Oreo cake. Gates has only two people on speed dial at his office: his wife Melinda, and Warren Buffett. The two men forged a strong connection over the years based on common values, shared interests, and a mutual love of numbers. One of the most important things Gates learned from Buffett is the importance of friendship. This week The 5-Minute Recharge explores how good relationships are the secret to a long, healthy, and happy life, and what you can do to make your relationships stronger. ONE QUOTE “The bubble got the best of me. I was in a dark place.” – LA Clippers basketball player Paul George admits that he underestimated the mental health effects of playing in isolation ONE IMAGE
A trio of Toronto artists–Rowell Soller, Flips, and Kreecha–collaborated to create this mural using greyscale to highlight the current global mood with a masked woman, representing Mother Nature or an artist, using a paintbrush to bring a rose back to its former glory THREE IDEAS #1 A REAL-LIFE SCROOGE STUDY Do you remember when Ebeneezer Scrooge was visited by a ghost from the future who showed him what his life would be like if he continued along the same lonely miserly path? Scrooge's creator Charles Dickens would have loved The Harvard Study of Adult Development that has been following people for over 80 years as they move through their lives, looking for the secrets of a happy life. The Harvard Study's subjects are our ghosts from the future with a message for all of us about how to live right now. The top-line finding of the study, as discussed in an illuminating new episode of The Art of Happiness with Arthur Brooks featuring Harvard Study director Robert Waldinger, is take care of your relationships. What surprised the Harvard researchers is how relationships get under your skin and into your body affecting your physical health as much as your mental health. The litmus test of a good relationship, according to Robert Waldinger is: does this person make you better, more energized, more engaged? (And do you do the same for them?) “Those who cared for their relationships and had good relationships were both mentally and physically healthier than those who had lousy relationships and didn’t care about their relationships.” – Robert Waldinger, The Art of Happiness Podcast #2 GOOD NEWS FOR NON-JERKS New research out of UC Berkeley indicates that being disagreeable–defined as selfish, combative and manipulative, in other words, a jerk–doesn't result in faster career progression. That's the good news. The bad news is that it doesn't result in slower career progression, either. Researchers found that whatever benefit being manipulative conferred was offset by poor interpersonal relationships. So being a jerk doesn't help or hinder career progression, but it does harm organizations where toxic behavior can do serious damage. The key takeaway from the research is that companies should focus on agreeableness as a critical selection filter when hiring new employees. “Agreeable people in power produce better outcomes.” – Cameron Anderson, co-author UC Berkeley study #3 WE'RE ALL A BIT OUT OF SOCIAL SHAPE Research on prisoners, hermits, soldiers, astronauts, polar explorers, and others who have spent extended periods of time in isolation points to a common conclusion: your social skills are like muscles that shrink when you don't use them. Don't be surprised if you've noticed that returning to a more expanded social life after weeks or months of sheltering in place feels uncomfortable. The feeling of awkwardness that comes with emerging from a social shell has made prisoners long to return to solitary confinement, and crew members sign up to return to Antarctica. It's normal to feel uneasy after being deprived of a full range of social experiences. Experts advise you to think of your social skills as a muscle that you need to work just as you work your body with exercise. Put aside some time each day to do social exercise with a chat, text, call or any communication beyond your immediate circle, and take it easy on yourself as your social muscles build back their strength. “The guys who survive best are the ones who write letters and maintain visitation and who maintain communication with other people.” – Craig Hainey, who has studied the effects of social isolation on inmates, has advice for everyone who has been an inmate of the pandemic *********************************** THE FAST FIVE 1. How self-control can actually unleash your dark side - BBC.com (Being disciplined can lead to some shocking outcomes.) 2. Men's Wellness Isn't Pleasant. It's Painful. - Slate.com (Wellness shouldn't look like limb-lengthening.) 3. How to Find Time to Go Outside - Humans Outside podcast (Time 43 minutes...or you can read the transcript) (Interview with time management guru Laura Vanderkam and a challenge to go outside for 20 consecutive minutes for 365 straight days.) 4. Eight secrets to a (fairly) fulfilled life - The Guardian (Oliver Burkeman knows when to stop looking for the secret to human happiness.) 5. For Successful Aging, Pick Up the Pace or Mix It Up - The New York Times (Oxygen efficiency decreases with age...or not.) *********************************** YOUR 5-MINUTE RECHARGE CHALLENGE A QUESTION OF CONNECTION Jennie Lee is the author of Spark Change: 108 Provocative Questions for Spiritual Evolution. One of her 108 questions has given us this week's 5-Minute Recharge Challenge. Lee laments how self-interest seems to be the way of the world right now, and even something as simple as holding the door open for a stranger has become too rare. The question that she asks us to ask ourselves with five minutes of journaling is... How can I be more thoughtful of those around me? Lee asks you to pay attention to the unspoken needs of the people around you. You may want to put her question on a sticky note and slap on your fridge or laptop as a daily reminder. “Being thoughtful makes a sweeter experience of life for everyone.” – Jennie Lee The final word this week goes to Warren Buffett...
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